“Destiny is not a matter of chance; it is a matter of choice. It is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved.”
― William Jennings Bryan
Whenever something bad happens to us, we often hear this being said to make us feel better, “it must be in your destiny. Now that it’s over, only good can happen”. When we do something good, we say it is ‘fate’ or good ‘karma’ or a plain simple ‘he/she just got dealt a lucky hand’. We are always attributing anything and everything that happens to the Universe. A belief that some place, some where there is a higher authority that tallies our lives into good, bad and will-come-back-to-bite-you.
Most of expressly believe in the concept ‘it’s written in our stars’ or believe it to be our kismet or some other transcendental form of record keeping. Seldom is it attributed to our conscious effort of trying to create a change or do some kindness. When events do or do not work in our favour, it is all due to some form of Universal karmic cycle that goes around and comes around.
Those who struggle with situations in their life, say a job or a relationship, when they find that things aren’t moving ahead, they tire of the fight and give it up saying that ‘if it’s meant to be, it will happen’. In India, everything is left upto ‘naseeb’ which is the Hindi equivalent to destiny and fate. Who makes this ‘naseeb’ or so called fate? Where is it found? And where do you buy heaps and heaps of it?
The fact of the matter is that you make your own destiny. There is no such thing as leave it upto ‘fate’. The Fates are old mean ladies who will seldom grant you what you want, forget what you actually deserve. True, they weave the fabric of our lives, but when it comes to rewarding for well deserved work, they are miserly. What saves the day in the end is plain old hard work and dedication and focus. It is these three and various allies of them that will get you to your destiny and fate.
We all have dreams of being somebody, making our parents proud of who we are and going somewhere with our lives. Then why do we shy away from hard work? Why do we not want to follow the natural path that could take us to where we want to be and use meek excuses such as destiny and fate to substitute for blood, sweat and tears? To get to where we want from where we are is not something that can be achieved overnight or with measured inputs of work. It takes an investment in our cause to achieve our goals. Unless you are willing to put in the capital of hard work, you cannot expect to make a profit or receive any dividend on your investment.
To give the example of just a few, Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Warren Buffet, Donald Trump etc did not wait around for destiny to take its course or complain about their fate when it came to lack of access to resources. They had the courage and gumption to fight off whatever was placed in their path, obstructing them from achieving their goals in life. ‘Destiny’ or ‘fate’ had nothing to do with their success or their achievements. They did what needed to be done in order to realise their dream. A lesson in perseverance is what we need to take from their books in order to understand the sheer amount of hard work and will power it must have taken them to accomplish what they have.
When you blame ‘destiny’ or ‘fate’ for the plight that you are in, take a step back and see if there is anything that you could have done differently. Did you try your level best? Did you give it your 110%? Was there anything that you missed out? Was there a better way of doing it? To be objective and impartial while being critical of one’s self is probably a very hard thing to do. To give in to self-pity is one of the worst things that you could ever do to yourself. Not only does it cloud judgment, but it induces the lack of desire and willingness to focus on what’s important.
When you work in tandem with the Universe around you, and not wait around for good fortune and luck just fall into your lap, you will realise that it is far simpler to achieve what you set out to than waiting around for destiny to roll in. it is imperative to remember that luck will accompany you only so much when you are being complacent in your work. To excel anywhere in life, what is required is a great passion and the determination to do the work in hand. If not, not even ‘destiny’ and ‘fate’ will be able to help you in shaping your life. So let your hard work shape your destiny and not the other way round.