There is a famous quote which states that- ‘The stupid neither forgives nor forget; the naïve forgive and forget; the wise forgive but do not forget’. Forgiveness is a word that means acknowledging the fact that you have been thrown into a well but still you have thought of letting the fact slip by that someone pushed you into it so as to live life in a peaceful manner. In the above sentence it might seem like it is a quality that should not be attained but the fact is that having the quality to forgive is an attribute that only few have. And these few are the people who are stronger than their fellow human beings. Always remember that- The weak can never forgive because Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.
On a personal viewpoint, if I have to choose forgiveness as a quality then I would, but with a clause. I believe that one should forgive but never should they forget. There might be numerous incidents in life that might have happened, or are in making or would be happening where my words might be apt in every way. If you are in office, college or even in your own home, the drama of life is at its peak. There might be the time when you might be going out with your so-called crush, or you might be working late shift at your office or you might be out on an excursion so as to learn about the world and the places around or you might be doing something that would have some adverse effect on you in one way or the other and you might be learning something from the experience. Experiences in life can be either good or bad but it is you who needs to understand that the situations aren’t things that you could have a hand into. It is not you who can control them but the consequences are all about destiny, time and the situation around.
If in case it was a negative experience, then you should forgive the person in time for what they did but what you should not do is to forget it. Remember it as a lesson to not repeat but do not tend to remember it at every path that you tread upon. This would only mean that you are taking yourself into the path of remorse and self-harm rather than in the road of self-awareness and improvement. You got to understand that Forgiving does not only mean forgiving the other person… Forgiving in a sense also means understanding yourself and healing yourself and forgiving your own self for getting into the complications and getting out of it in good time.
There might be times when you would be stabbed in the back by your most trusted persons…your friends or even the person you love. But it is something that is not to get surprised at because this is what life had for you but it was for a positive future and it is what you need to understand. There might be times when people would be spouting out negative comments for you and would be saying the rudest and the meanest things onto your face. Instead of thinking about them and researching on the facts, just forgive the person but do not forget that they insulted you and it might happen in the future that they might again insult you and for that time be ready. And the best solution is to definitely keep a safe distance from them.
For the person who loved you and just betrayed you, you might be having thoughts about ‘it might not have ended if…’ and ‘I hope to get back….’ and other revelations but the thing is that it is always the worst experience when someone you gave your all betrayed you. But the thing is they weren’t worthy of you and they were someone who could never understand what you were and how much they mattered for you. It is not only about love but each and every day people let each other down and therefore, the best thing to do is to forgive people but keep a safe distance from them in case they betray you again. Forgive them not for their sake but for your heart’s sake so that you might in a way move forward and do what your heart feels like without getting affected by the unwanted people like these.
Martin Luther King stated a beautiful line that- ‘Darkness cannot drive out darkness, only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that’. The thing about forgiveness that I personally really like is that it is the virtue of a strong person and not everyone has it. To fight people is easy but to forgive them and move on and try to make a mark for you is something that only strong ones can think of doing. It is always easy for people to hurt each other’s feelings but to forgive people is something that cannot be done by everyone around. So if you want to be stronger from heart then learn to forgive but never to forget.