Forgive, forget, let it go, do not care and so many things we have all been hearing since ages and probably, might have read in many books and pages. I know, you must be thinking here is yet another article which might tell the same and which, is actually easily said, but not as easily done. As much as we have seen, read or heard about forgiveness, how many of us have really tried to adopt it in our lives? Have you? We might have even thought, why should I? Or How is it going to help?
Children go to school, read their lessons from a ready written text books and learn new things everyday in different fields, which helps them to grow and improve knowledge. Some of those who learned their lessons better, move on to better stage in their lives and try to be more successful. Our life is also, like a book (more like a novel) in which each day is a different chapter. People we meet are different characters played and they each have a significant role in our lives.
Building a relationships with the people we care is something which humans do best and in the process, its quite common to have difference in opinions. Most times, people whom we like might not have similar liking towards us. When people we care or respect or who we might be even just acquainted reacts to us in a hurtful way, it is natural that we get hurt and carry those hurt feelings with us for a very long time.
Our feelings and our thoughts are our real baggage and carrying hurt feelings and disappointments can also cause many health problems as well. These hurt feelings also gives birth to other negatives such as hatred, revenge, cruelty, selfishness, loneliness, depression and what not! Do we really need these many issues just because we are hurt about something happened in the past? Surely not, isn’t it! There is a reason when someone tells let bygones be bygones or forgive and forget.
Again, I agree its not as easy as its said, but to stay happy in life this is one of the mantra to be adopted.
When animals living in cooperative groups can make up with each other after a fight by hugging each other, touching horns, flippers or noses, we are a far more better species, don’t you agree?
Here are some ways which you can try to forgive and to forget that unpleasant past that makes you angrier, depressed or just sad.
Our actions are the one, which defines us and hence at difficult situations it is most important to keep your cool and do not react based on our past history with anyone or even based on someone else words. “Think before you act” is the best way to follow which helps your entire life journey.
Wear the other person shoes
Sounds funny? We might carry hurt feelings about something which happened in our past and it can be impossible to think positive of that someone who is a cause for our feelings, but take a moment and place yourself in their place and think how differently you would have reacted. Most times we realize that we would have done the same. There is not a single human on this earth, who is born perfect and everyone do mistakes, ‘To err is human and to forgive is divine’. Even the most great people have done mistakes in life but the difference is they have learned from their mistakes and have practiced the art of let go and to forgive. Hence its important to understand the situation of the other person before you hurt yourself or anyone else.
Express your feelings
Any relationship is based on the openness and how free we are with each other to express our feelings. It is natural to be hurt, but a relationship can die if we do not nurture it properly. Sometimes there is a possibility that someone’s actions or words spoken can be very hurtful for us, but keeping the feelings in mind without expressing it, is one wrong way to lead a relationship. The other person might not be aware about how you feel, although they might not mean to hurt you. Talking out and expressing about your feelings and resentments can sometimes help you to forgive and to forget.
Forgiveness to Forget
Forgiveness is an attitude which you grow based on many other qualities. It is most important to forgive a person who might have hurt u bad to forget the entire incident and to move on. Without forgiving it can be impossible for you to forget. Forgetting does not have to literally mean that it has to be completely erased, like the incident never happened, but when we forgive, we come to a state of mind of acceptance and think beyond the hurt feelings and see the true face of the other person. Sometimes, there might not be a way to reconcile, but forgiveness will set your mind free and can make you feel more peaceful. Love, care, acceptance are some of the qualities which helps you to develop the attitude of forgiveness.
To stay happy in life, we must let the bygones be and forgive the people who might be a reason of discomfort for us knowingly or unknowingly. Learn your lessons from every chapter of your life and be grateful for every single person in your life. A hand shaken with every single person has a meaning in our lives and every failure will have a lesson for us to learn.
So forgive and forget your ill past and enjoy your today and create a better tomorrow for you and for all.