TING! TING! TING! TING! Welcome folks to our new section of WWE! It is the ultimate battle from the beginning of time! The battle of two social institutions, both equally influencing and important! Who will win? On one side we have our loyal, understanding friends while on the other we have our family, who are always there for us.
Family makes the first move, just like they do in the average child’s life, but friends are not far behind. Friendship gives family a damaging blow with their acceptance but family strikes back with constant support. It looks like a close one guys! Stay tuned to see who will win in this never ending battle of these two superpowers!
In all our lives we have two main spheres of socialization, our friends and our family. Both these groups tend to be equally important to us and are constantly at war for our attention. Is one group more important than the other? Some, or rather most might say that definitely your family is more important than your friends, because your family has been with you since the beginning of time. But in my opinion they both enjoy equal statures simply because your families are people who due to their blood relations with you, on some level have to accept you whereas your friends are just random people you happened to have met who like you because of you. They have been charmed and swept of their feet by nothing but your personality, or at least we’d like to believe that. I think it’s sad that we live in a society where friendships take a back seat.
Our relationships with our friends are treated as frivolous and expendable. It’s not uncommon for us to hear things like you can skip that out going with your friends and stay home with your family, after all your family is more important.
Now you also have to understand that your family too wants your time and attention and they believe that because you are related to them by blood and that they will always be there for you, they command more importance. They feel that friends come and go, but they will remain. They are strong believers that only they truly have your best interest at heart, no one else is capable at treating you the way they do. And I mean you can’t blame them, most families are strong protectors of their members. They support each other both financially and emotionally.
Sociologically your family consist of your primary group of interaction. They are your main sphere of socialization during the first few years of your life. These years are crucial as most of your development happens then. But then again people change, and in my opinion they are always changing.
While your family contributed to who were when you were seven they might not necessarily have contributed to who you are when you are, let’s say twenty. That’s where your friends come in. Your peer group is as important a relationship as your family. Unlike your authoritative family where you are a youngster and are compelled to obey your elders in the peer group you are an equal. Hence the peer group is often known as an egalitarian group, by sociologist only obviously.
Within your friends you make the rules. You decide what y’all accept and y’all don’t. It’s also a platform where you can talk about things you’d rather not discuss with your family. And who said friends don’t last forever? Even though they are not bonded to you by blood, friends, well the ones that matter anyway, will still treat you as if they were. In a sense they are like your extended family.
So clearly both groups are equally important to our lives and it is not possible to hold one higher than the other, so what we need to find, is balance.
Instead of catering to both groups we tend to pick one. We either think that friendships are not going to last the wear and tear of life, and that it would be better to invest our time in building relationships with our families. Or we favor our friends more, which mostly tends to be the case. Here we think that our family does not understand us or that they are not accepting and the only place we can find solace is in our friends, people who we believe are in the same boat as us, people we can trust, they are inexperienced personnel we hold to be the wisest.
We desperately need to understand that though our families can always love, some things are hard for them to accept and though our friends may deliver the ‘best’ advice, a more knowledgeable person can prove to be the better option.
Don’t let anyone bully you into believing your friends are not worth it or not as important as your family, because if you only view the relationship, they are as important. So go out with them, get closer and build strong lasting relationships, but at the same time don’t forget that you have a loving family waiting for you at home. They may not always understand you or get your point of view, but they have your best interest at heart. And if in moments of doubt, if you do distrust their affection, remember that they were the ones bathing you, putting up with all your rubbish and changing your dirty nappies. It takes a lot of love for that kind of dedication.