Good friends versus Best friends

Well, we all have friends. I mean, I hope we do, like except loners and completely anti social people who’ve created a parallel world around them or some who are too self absorbed to look around, like they just have fans, no friends, not really. But yes, most of us do have friends. Now there are levels of friendship just like there are levels in everything else. Levels of excitement, levels of food craving, levels of liking etc, there are levels of friendship too. Here we have, acquaintances, we have okay friends, we have good friends, very good friends and then best friends. I hope to god that if not all of them, every one of us has a best friend. I’ll tell you why best friends are so essential to our existence. It’s one person who has no blood relation with you so you don’t sometimes need to keep stuff from them that they’d find inappropriate, for example blocking relatives off social networking sites because they consider certain pictures of ours objectionable, and then again, you’re not romantically involved with them.


You don’t have to dress up nice and be all clean when you go see them, you don’t have to buy irrelevant gifts for them for irrelevant occasions, you don’t necessarily have to talk to them all day and night. They’re the chill part of your life, the kind of relationship everyone needs, where you can actually breathe. And then again, they know you too well. You don’t have to explain to them each time why you’re upset, they just know. Also they know how to cheer you up so they’ll probably bring home a box of your favourite cupcakes and watch you hog and sulk and cry and blurt it all out in an instant blissfully and then they’ll laugh at how shabby you look maybe. But then who the hell cares, they’re your best friend. They’re mandatorily supposed to accept you in all forms, in all shapes and sizes, with oily hair, not so acne free face, in your oversized tee shirt and weirdly printed pyjamas. That’s their deal with you, the price they pay for being your best friend. And again, there are perks too. I mean, they know at the end of the day you’re going to be there for them 24*7*365. They’re your 4 am phone call when you can’t fall asleep and you need to talk to someone. They’re your shoulder to cry on, your shopping companion, your dessert date partner and well everything else too. They’re just slightly short of family since they don’t qualify the blood relation criteria; Rest is all the same. Now why is there this difference between a good friend and a best friend? Acquaintances you would barely even think about. They’re the hi hello people you have to just keep in touch with for the sake of it.


The good friend category will qualify a lot of your best friend criteria, but they’re just not there yet. I mean there are about ten people in a room and nine of them are your good friends. Of course you’ll talk to them a lot too and expect some understanding from them and spend time with them. You’ll probably hug them before leaving. But the chemistry that you share with that one best friend just isn’t there. These people understand you only partly and probably don’t approve of certain characteristics of you. They like you, but their lives are not as entangled with yours. They appreciate the person that you are and enjoy your company but then that’s it, the line’s drawn right there. You’ll still need to think before you say something to them, the amount of liberty just isn’t the same. You’ll probably be a nice saner version of yourself with them, but then that in my viewpoint really curbs a person doesn’t it? I mean friendship is supposed to be the easiest relationship there is. You’re as free to enter into one as you are to leave. It’s the people you’ve chosen for yourself because you feel like they’re going to keep you happy and are going to accept you for who you are too. They’re going to stand by you during your hard times but well, you cannot expect them to go out of their way to help you out.

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They require acknowledgement and constant reminder of your affection towards them, it’s not unsaid. They will make you think twice. While your best friend is the person who’ll jump into the water to save you even if they don’t know how to swim and they don’t require a thank you in return; you being safe and sound is good enough for them. They’ve seen the best of you and the worst of you, and yet they have never been able to get themselves to love you any less. You fight like stray dogs with them and your choices don’t necessarily match. It’s not friendship out of convenience or choice, it becomes a necessity. They are your safety cushion and you know you’re not going to find another one like them. You know their room better than you know your own and you’re nearly made to feel like you have been adopted by their parents. You will seek security only in the arms of this person, when there are family issues, relationship issues or other friend issues. And you know your friendship will stand the test of time. And even if you meet them ten years hence, your equation will remain unchanged, despite all circumstances and differences. They’re who you trust with your life, and with your death and they’re all the trouble worth keeping.

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