Happy Valentine’s Day: Do We Really Need a Day for Love?

“It wouldn’t be my move,” Jace agreed. “First the candy and flowers, then the apology letters, then the ravenous demon hordes. In that order.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Bones.

I look around confused. Not because of my miseries of being single, they aren’t miseries at all. I am rather confused of the hyperbolic reaction of people to the concept of valentine’s week. What started off as a day, as a commemoration of St. Valentine has now transmuted to a week of celebration for couples all over the world. Don’t give me those stares. I have nothing against love, couples, or the idea of celebrating the feeling. I am a believer of the institution of love too, and a die- hard romantic. Really. I idealize the old world charm the word holds. I have held nothing against the modernity to it too. I find it formidable to live in a world without love. That would be a world without a lot other basic emotions too. Fear would die too, we fear because we love- people, things and the very idea of being alive. Selflessness too would be gone, we are selfless because we love. Nostalgia, Hysteria, attachment, hurt- all will be gone. A vagueness of robotic life would remain minus the organized programming. The very idea of existence would be questioned, we don’t exist, we co-exist. Love, in general, is the basis of life. But the love associated with Valentine’s day is a more narrowed down approach. It is love between two individuals linked romantically. My idea is not to enlighten you on the whats and whys’ of Valentine’s Day. I would not question why valentine’s day. I’d rather question why not all other days are valentine’s days too.

valentines

They say its valentines and love is in the air. Where the valentines is oxygen? I’d rather prefer love in hearts, but that’s my personal choice. My friends seem pretty excited at the ideas of roses and teddy bears, chocolates and promises, hugs and kisses, proposals and dates. Is that all about love? I thought that was about regulating the economy of gift shops and hangout places. I am no economist to bifurcate my observation, but I have seen love deeper. Heartbreak has not made me a writer as you might contemplate. I know they say to surf the surfaces right, you should dive the depths. Also they say that the best poets were lonely in love. I remember Edward Allen Poe’s ‘The Raven’ at the mention of it. How things we leave unnoticed can transform into pieces of art for heartbreaks cause you to look beyond the seen but there are some obvious moments we see but choose to ignore too. We do not dive the depths but are pretty close. I have seen love closer, and felt it too. I have seen my grandfather keep awake for a minute more than my grandmother to check on her blanket, and that he did every day. I see my mother pretend to sleep at 10 so that dad can watch one of his favourites on television. That she does every day. That, I call love. They do not need Valentine’s day to care for each other. They do not wait for texts each hour.  They have no expectations linked to the valentine’s week. My dad though has celebrated every day of the week religiously ever since I remember existing. But that was not what defined their relationship. They did it for a more precise expression of it. He won’t see tantrums if his roses were not in time. He made sure they were in time all these years because he liked it to be so.

It may be 23rd march, or 6th july or xx-xx-xxxx. Why should the date matter at all? It is about expressing and celebrating the feeling of love, you can do it anytime you please. Romeo and Juliet have been considered epitomes of the bond of love. I would rest my debates and go the conventional way and believe that they were. I don’t remember the episode when they waited for the 14th of February to immortalize their love. Pyramus and Thisbe too, did not conceptualize the day of love. They believed every day belonged to them. No wonder Ovid has been little appreciated as a romantic poet by the European classical reader in the 21st century. He did not suit our ideals of love. Why should we read him. Can love really have a day. Is not the day you call it your meeting anniversary ‘supposed’ to be your day of love then? Imagine if history had skipped that day altogether?

Why cannot we celebrate every day as though it is made for love, it really is though, why else do I feel no difference in the air, except that of temperature on 14th February and 14th August?  Because there is none, the days are both equally saturated with love as much as they are with love. Only it is our perception that changes. It is like seeing the glass half full or half empty. When we are thirsty, we’d see it half full. When we have just drunk from it, we’ll see it half empty. We believe in valentine’s day because the world wants us to. We believe in all days being of love because we believe in love. Happy Valentine’s day, today, tomorrow and for every day you live. Live with love, life might seem a better place.

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