She left her house and moved into a new house after marriage, it was a new life all together, she had a new identity, she was a wife. She accepted all of this and gave her best in return, she tried to handle situations like her mother did. Only after she left her mother’s house did she realize the true depth of their relationship. One thing that always scared her was will she be able to give the same love to her own daughter like her mother did? Yes, she will because the bond of a mother and daughter is one of a kind.
There is no denying that a Mother loves all her children equally be it a girl or a boy, but the bond that she shares with a daughter is very special. A daughter is a mother’s gender partner, her closest ally in the family confederacy, an extension of her self.
A mother relives her childhood through her daughter. She teaches her how to play how to build a castle just like she did at her age. I remember how my mother used to play with me and my dolls. I loved kitchen sets and my mother bought all the latest ones in the market for me, she must have eaten thousands of my imaginary cooked lunches and dinners with me. She would tell me stories of all the things she did with her mother, I still love listening to her stories even though I know them by heart, but the twinkle in her eyes and smile on her face while narrating her childhood memories is my favourite expression on her.
The relationship of a mother~ daughter passes through several phases I think. First the mother plays a role of a teacher in her daughter’s life. Teaching her to walk, to build blocks, to say big words and form sentences. Once in school, the mother teaches her nursery rhyme, alphabets, teaches her to read and write, she helps her with her homework. When the daughter enters her teens the mother switches roles and becomes her confidante. She tries to understand her daughter’s psychology and at the same time tries to imbibe good values in her. By the time the daughter is in her late teens a mother becomes her best friend. A mother is her daughter’s teacher, confidante, guide,advisor and her best friend for life.
When Mom is cooking in the kitchen she always call for me and tells me she needs help because it’s a two person recipe. Only two together and make the magic work. I know she can manage alone but she just wants to spend more time with me and in the process hand her talent of cooking delicious food to me. I find it very difficult to shop with my Mom, I don’t think anyone can advice me the way she does, I know in the world she is the only person who would want me to have the best after all. Mom and I do a lot of crazy things together and am so glad that I have got that zest to live life to the fullest from her. In a lot of ways I am like her and I take that as a compliment, I think all daughters should. After all if it wasn’t for her we would not be a better person today. A mother tells her daughter she is beautiful, but at the same time tells her she is smart, strong and capable and she should not give up just because the going gets tough.
I love the bond that I share with my mother, we sit on her bed and talk about all the random things in the world till late in the night.The evenings when I sip my coffee and she, her tea in the balcony. The times when we play candy crush or bubble mania together on the Ipad and high five when we cross a level. The times when we giggle after sharing a dirty joke like it’s our little secret. The times when we listen to old hindi music together and sing along, she more melodious than me. Teaming up against dad for something we want. I wish I could just hold on to these moments forever.
I think my mother completes me but she says it is me who has completed her, she has taught me to smile even in the hardest of times and she says I have taught her to dream and live again.
One day a daughter has to leave her house and her mother behind to embark a new journey in her life, this doesn’t mean the bond she shares with her mother weakens, in fact now she understands her mother much better. My sister called Mom after her marriage and said- ” Mom thank you for teaching me to give love, comfort, warmth and happiness, today my new family said, your mother has taught you well, that’s when I realized how with your patience,love,and tender care you have moulded me into this beautiful person without me knowing what you were doing all this while.”
A mother gradually builds a bond with her daughter, lets her grow her own wings, readies her to fly with every passing day, let’s her spread her wings and one day when the mother thinks she has taught her daughter all that she could she let’s her fly soaring high, because she trusts her and believes in her like no one will ever do.
“The mother-daughter relationship is the most complex”. – Wynonna Judd
So true, and the depth of this quote only a mother~daughter will know.