Let’s face it: we spend too much time looking for things and people and places to make us happy. The idea that joy, peace, and contentment is something which we will find outside of ourselves, through pursuit of the ‘other’, is so ingrained within all of our minds that we fail to realize our own potential for happiness – that we are the vessels for all the joy and good things our own life holds for ourselves, and that ‘all you need is you!’
The process of finding fulfillment within one’s own self starts with a positive realization of our own capabilities and qualities, of being able to embrace who we are – the bad and the good, and all the shades of grey – to surround your own being with so much love and warm energy that our own power becomes capable of transformation, of achieving all that you can imagine and desire.
If you think about it a little, it actually makes perfect sense: remember all those times those hour-long conversations with your friend helped them figure out that no, the job wasn’t right for them, or any of those other times you made an impact on some person in your life? Doesn’t it make sense, that you could be capable of channeling a change in your own life, not just in others? There’s no denying the fact that we can’t live in vacuum and isolation from all other people, and the role of experiences and relationships cannot be negated in our self-growth and development. Sometimes, there’s no other way to gain an insight into our own hearts than through someone else’s perceptive eyes, to tell us the realities and nitty-gritty of our own souls. But what then? After we realize our shortcomings, or realize what we want, we are the agents of our own change, and very powerful ones at that.
To achieve a sense of purpose and contentment within one’s own self, it’s imperative that our own aura is positive and warm – it’s easy to develop this, fill your day with random, caring acts of kindness, with smiles and words of appreciation for strangers, with less anger and frustration and a little more acceptance and receptivity. As you put out the junk of negative thought from your head, you will automatically observe a greater and smoother sense of accomplishment in your life. It’s this chain of positivity that not only makes another person’s day better, but resonates throughout the world around you, and lends itself back to you in the most unimaginable and beautiful ways possible.
Remember Rhonda Byrne’s The Secret? Even if it’s a little hard to grasp or put our minds around the idea of the world actually being a ‘wish-granting factory’ (The Fault in our Stars plug-in!), this much actually is true: we cannot witness or be aware of all the ripples and tides of the things we do and say, and often, the good positivity you trigger will not be something you actually see for yourself, you cannot see how exactly you made someone’s day or uplifted their mood with a smile.
So, tend to the garden within yourself, and plant beautiful flowers and fresh-smelling plants in your soul, let them grow and flourish, and send out these lovely auras into the world. Listen to your self-intuition, and do things do make your own ‘within’ a gorgeous place: listen to new music, go to new places, don’t wait for company to go out to dinner at a place you really like. You need to make your own soul flourish, and allow it to be strong and steadfast.
The trick, then, to finding fulfillment within yourself, is to continuously push yourself to the best of your standards and to the best and most impossible limits of your capabilities. Stop caring about how to fit into moulds, what the standards of “normality” in society are. You don’t need to comply: defy where you have to, and lead your own life, happy with yourself. As you follow this path, you will have to face your innate need of society lauding you for your achievements, for your goodness, but this sense of immediate rewarding is also something which society has driven us to: you need to learn to grow out of it, and do good and care for yourself without believing in a system of immediate reward and returns.
Always keep in mind that the best and most enlightening return you can get is a better you, a brighter and more positive you, a more self-reliant you. And this is exactly what we are working towards, with kindness, positivity, and self-fulfillment. Allow yourself to shine. That is your reward, and isn’t being a complete person, being utterly comfortable in your own skin, the best thing you could possibly wake up to?
The process, if you think of it, isn’t actually that complicated either: it just needs you to get rid off some pre-conceived notions you hold about how the world works, and the limits acting upon you. Once you let go of these shackles of society and of your own self, you will be quickly on the road to being a person able to live life on their own terms, and this will actually make you more receptive to all the positivity and warm the world throws at you.