The Pseudo-Freedom of Living Alone

“Dude! I am fed up of living at home. After class 12th I’ll join a college that is far away from this place.”

Read this statement and look back into history. Doesn’t it remind you of your teenage days. The days when you used to through tantrums at your parents, highly frustrated at the fact that they become over concerned about any and everything possible and you were like, “Oh God! when will all this end? Let me complete my schooling,after this I’ll run to Singapore for higher studies and will finally be able to enjoy my freedom.” And falling prey to the demands as usual, most of the parents agree to send their kids out for study. With the weirdest dreams in your minds, you pack your bags in excitement and head  towards the new city, with the image of a ‘rocking’ college life in your minds. But ever that glitters is not gold. Once you enter into the new world, things  tend to get Topsy turvy. Suddenly you seem your parents, your home, your family.


No matter how much freedom you gain once you begin to live alone, no
matter how much fun you have with your friends boozing and partying all night, but it never ever comes at par with the happiness and contentment you achieve when u feel homely. Yes there is no one to stop you from talking on the phone all night,yes there is no one to compel you to study, yes there is no one who wants to keep a track of where you are going and with whom you are. But at the same time, there is no one to pamper you, there is no to serve you food when you come back highly tired from work, there is no one to build up your confidence when you feel low and of course there is no one to be your support system during the exams.You eat or not, no one cares; you study or not, no one gives a damn; you are happy or sad, no one is ever concerned. “Mom I don’t feel like eating cabbage so please make something else for me.” You no more have the right to say this. If you don’t like cabbage made for dinner in your pg/hostel today, you have only 2 options: eat it or leave it. The third option of someone specially making something of your choice is no more an option now.

a paying guest

This helplessness, loneliness and self dependence sometimes make the
situations so depressing that you actually crave for your parents to come and scold you for not studying, you want someone to ask you where
are you and when will you be back, someone to pamper you so much that you begin to cry out of happiness.

This is how life is. When you have something, you don’t value it. But when you no more have any access to that thing, you are ready to bring
it back at any cost. You must be thinking that I want you all to to lock yourselves in your homes and never ever come out of the cocoon. But this is not the case.

The experience of living in a pg/hostel is completely bad. Charles Bukowski has said, “the strongest people are the most alone.” So
living away from your parents in a place that is alien to you teaches you to be independent, strong and brave. You learn to tackle all
problems in your life all by yourself and then feel proud about the same. Time management, the ability to face the cruel world and of course the freedom to own your discretion are somethings that only self dependence can teach. Also when you live in a pg/hostel, you come in direct contact with people who may not be of your own state/place, your religion or even don’t understand your language. This complexity and diversity moulds you into a culturally tolerant person and helps you to adjust in an area that doesn’t fit into your comfort zone. The world is an encyclopedia and the sky is the limit. Thus to obtain the knowledge that it provides its important to step out and explore.What matters is the approach. If you want to live away from your home with a study-oriented approach, go ahead.

But if the decision is just for the fact that you feel that your freedom is being violated at your home and you can live all by yourself, then think again. As adolescents you tend to over estimate our abilities and consider ourselves to be capable enough to manage everything on our own. You feel that we are well aware of what’s right and wrong and thus we should be full freedom to take all the decisions of our lives. You are big enough to live alone, to conquer all worries and don’t need the support guidance of our parents our any one else.  Soon you will realise that the feeling of homeliness is something inexplicable and unparalleled. Thus if you really consider yourself big enough to be called a mature being, learn to acknowledge the indispensability of ‘home’.

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