Learning and growing up have always gone hand-in-hand. And with children, it has always been a pleasure for the parents to watch them grow up, physically and mentally. But who teaches them? Parents, yes! They are the deciders of the lifestyle of the child. Teachers, to an extent. Most children between 5-8 aspire to become one of their most beloved teachers when they grow up. Its always there! Next in the list, siblings. They do influence quiet a lot. But, again, their way of teaching is either copied or inherited from their parents or teachers or friends. Media, plays a huge role too. It can influence the child in both the good way and the bad way.
Children from late 80’s or the 90’s were pretty much idle compared to the today’s children when it comes to learning non-academic stuff from school. Those days the maximum a child would learn from his/her friend was a trick from a cartoon or the craving for a particular candy. But, today, there’s so many things kids learn. And they learn things at an exponential rate. When I say ‘things’ I mean both the good and the bad.
Peer pressure is touching its limits these days. As I said earlier, there are 2 sides to a coin. A friend might teach the other, the meaning of an English word or an easier way to remember the nine planets of the solar system. But, on the other hand, a child of age 8 or 9 might be influenced to get glued to the television all day. The level of domination does vary. But it is known to be harmful. Television and video games shall cease at a particular age. But as he/she grows up there are so many other repercussions that pull down the child and affect the child in so many ways.
Not that the parents don’t warn them or caution them. They do it well in advance. And they give it their all. So why do they give in to peer pressure? They tend to develop audaciousness. They want to be treated as a grown up in the household and they develop animosity (extreme hatred) towards advices and rules. They, all of a sudden start behaving weird and treat their parents with bad mannerisms. The rolling eyes and talking back sets in to show that the child is no more a child but an adolescent.
They are worried that their friends might make fun of them if they don’t get along with the group. They constantly meditate that, they shouldn’t be doing anything that will make the friends hate him/her. They want to show their friends that they are capable of over-powering their parents and treating them like dirt. They want to act mature and show to the world that their level of thinking is completely different from their parents. In some other cases, the perception that “everyone does it” drives them towards making the same mistake as their peers and forces them to fall-prey for many of the known bad habits and mannerisms. Mannerisms include boorish and cheeky attitude, being vulgar and impolite. Habits include a lot. Most of us have seen and been through such phases.
Most teenagers today, have that one friend who has seen or they themselves have either been, a drug addict or has seen pregnancies and abortions, or have been under the addiction of alcohol and cigarettes. All this is not just because of the peer gang. It also sets in with the advent of media with cheap and awful elements in it. The media apart from movies and television also includes the internet and mobile phones where they are exposed to atrocious rates of dreadful garbage. They get glued to their phones and talk for ages and ages. They text all day and night and even that small beep tone will wake them up in the middle of the night and they continue to text under their sheets.
To deal with adolescents is quite a big task for the parents. But, at times, not dealing with it is the right solution. They do put the parents on roller coaster and it will eventually fade off when they are 17 or 18. They will start realizing their responsibilities and act accordingly. When your daughter tries to sneak out of the house with short skirts, do not scold her. Talk to her normally about something else and just ask her to be conscious of her clothes. That one sentence will constantly prick her on the inside. But, on the other hand, when you scream or shout, your daughter will change to her long skirts or jeans just to remove them when she enters the mall to show off her short skirt beneath. Restricting them with pocket money is another wrong deed that parents do. Give them the cash they ask for. Ask them to account for every penny and in turn restrict their time with the laptops or tablets. When you follow the “give and take” policy, where you give them something they ask for and you take something from them, it does sound like a fair deal and makes them realize the importance of both ‘the given and the taken’ novelty.