Trust: the thread that binds us all

Long ago, I used to keep wondering why my sister constantly keeps making such a fuss about how important trust is in any relationship. I mean I was always like if you love someone everything else just settles on it’s own. Like everything is negotiable, you can deal with it. But she’d constantly keep emphasizing on the fact that trust is the most imperative pillar of a relationship that’s capable of standing through the test of time. When we’re young we just hang on to the big things and feel like they’ll get us through everything. Love has been everyone’s favourite word for as long as I can remember. It’s been my favourite at least. Love sounds so enigmatic and fascinating that we’re like yeah, let’s stick with that. It’s all we’re ever going to need. Like when you think of work initially, you’re like all you want is money, but then once you grow up and you’re working in a company that feeds you a mouthful of money but then you get no holidays, working hours are unlimited, and the job is tedious and monotonous, how far is money going to sail your boat then?

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There are way too many little things that make an enormous amount of difference in our lives which we mostly choose to ignore simply because it’s convenient to do so. Only when to get there that you realise what you’ve been indifferent towards all along is exhaustively everything you had to worry about. You know trust is something you build on; love can even happen instantly. As a matter of fact, lately you’re capable of falling in love with someone over texts too. Why it’s so essential to be able to trust someone is because our hearts have an appetite for love that knows no bounds. We just grab it wherever we see it, and we do actually love plenty of things in life. Unless and until you’re going to venture into that very deep meaning of love, we’re perfectly capable of loving many things and people at once. You love anything that makes you happy, don’t you? You feel deeply affectionate towards it. I’m not saying you feel that unconditional, I’ll go all out of my way for you kind of love for everything. But you do feel that very easy to handle, happy to feel kind of love, probably for over 12 hours In a day if you’re lucky.

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As much as our heart wants love, it feels the need to confide in someone too. Now the thing about confiding in someone is, we all tend to get a little picky in that department. Because our brains start functioning right at the moment we feel the urge to utter something personal to someone. You cannot run up to a random person in the crowd and narrate them the story of your life and expect them to understand or care. In all likelihood it’ll go wildfire because for them it’s news, it’s not something that even remotely affects them and maybe neither are you. If you cannot trust someone and be able to say what you feel to them without any hesitation or second thoughts, what comfort level are you sharing with them anyway? Just because you’re hanging out with someone and all you do is crack jokes doesn’t mean that there won’t be a day when you’ll feel the need for that emotional outlet. And when you start looking for it in that person who’ve had your couple of thousand moments of joy with and you don’t find it in them? That’s going to cause some serious disappointment. People are not meant for killing time, they’re supposed to keep you a hundred percent happy from within. You can laugh at old joke only for so long, such things don’t last you a lifetime.

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It’s those days when you bury yourself in someone’s chest and cry your heart out without such as a single thought passing your head, that’s what’s going to last. As much as you may try to convince yourself that you can sustain a relationship without trust, you cannot. There’s nothing more painful than not being able to trust someone and pour your heart out to them even when that’s all you really want to do. You want to share every intricate detail of your life with them and bore them the most frivolous things and legendary experiences you’ve had. You just want to lay out and out in front of someone like that, completely raw and naked and not feel afraid. That’s what you need most, believe me. No form of love or affection can compensate for unsaid comfort. And trust when broken is literally irreparable. Because once you really trust someone, you give them so much of you that you feel it’s almost obvious that they have to take care of it. You lose a part of yourself when you lose faith, because hope leaves your body just as faith does. And what’s life without hope, right? So think and correctly judge someone before you invest so much faith in them. Not everyone is worth the privilege of knowing you inside out. Keep yourself sacred and safe for the ones who deserve this. Because William Shakespeare once very correctly said “Love all, but trust a few.”

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