As we move forward and go about our daily work and chores in this fast moving modern world, we find it difficult to find time for ourselves and needs. Ever stepped back and wondered what our old parents/ grandparents/ or the aged people feel as they find themselves in the midst of this ever changing world, silent as ever, not able to move as their body gives in and watch and try to take in as much of this world as they can in their last years?
Be their walking stick: Your grandparents and you!
Don’t you wonder sometimes how it must be for them to brave the loneliness attached with the old age. To witness their organs working slower and fail ,to witness their skin getting wrinkles,and witnessing their body giving up everyday. These are the people who have seen life from being an infant to the age they are in, 60-80 years or even more than that ,which plays in front of their eyes everyday when they think about life and the people attached to it.
They spent their lives working and taking care of their kids and earn a living just so we could sustain and get good education for a brighter future, and now when they have time to actually reflect back on their life and share their experiences and learnings with us, we cannot find the time to sit with them and learn something about their life experiences.
Our old parents/grand parents have raised us since we were infants to the person we have become now. They have spent a large chunk of their life working hard and taking care of our needs just so we become what we have become today. But now, at the age they are in where they expect us to help them out and be there for them the most, we cannot help but find our day to day work more important than them.
It is said that as a human grows from and infant to an adult and grows into the old age, he again becomes an infant and his needs become the same. He needs to be taken care of, pampered, fed, and entertained by his family around. A person when he grows old, looses the normal judgement he has when he was in his youth. His body parts and brain starts slowing down and he starts depending upon the family/people around to guide him and help him out through these years.
They spent their years of youth taking care of us, nurturing us, and in return they never expected anything from us except that we will be the ones taking care of them in their years of difficulty and loneliness. But we should ask ourselves, if we actually are helping them in any way? It should not be viewed as help but it should come out from our heart -spending some quality time with our old folks and taking care of their needs should be our priority too.
The youth of today not only finds it difficult to spend time with family, but also their old grand parents. Somewhere they feel that sitting with them and not having a common topic to talk about is plain boring and wasteful. They find talking to their friends more interesting or just social networking.
The adults find it difficult to get spare quality time to be spent with their old parents just because of exhausting schedules of their jobs. After weekdays of work all day, they prefer partying or recreation over the weekend rather than sitting at home and spending time with their old parents.
In their old age, they are just left thinking about their years of youth, how active they were and how much work they used to complete in a day when they see their next generation. They feel sad about the fact that they cannot do their work on their own anymore and it makes themselves feel like a liability on their next generation they are living with.
They feel sad at the fact that their life is ending and they expect us to spare some time out from our daily routine just to talk to them and involve them in our new world and its activities.
They expect us to just take some time out from our busy schedule ,to just sit with them and give them company. To make them feel that they are not living alone and going through this old age without any support from their loved ones. They need the love and affection any child would need. They like listening to our stories and giving us valuable advice which would last for a lifetime,which we could pass on to our next generation as well.
They don’t expect us to take them to restaurants or fancy places everyday just for their recreation. They just need assurance and company in their last phase of life that their loved ones are there with the support they need in their old age.
Our old folks might not be conscious of the basic etiquette and tend to forget where they are sometimes and do something inappropriate in a situation, but they expect us not to judge them,and understand that their senses stop working in this age, and we need to guide them with the wrongs and rights in this stage of their life. We need to act as a walking stick for them to walk through these last years of life easily.
They don’t need fancy gifts, and food, they just need the love and care by the people they love. Sparing out 15 minutes a day just to talk to them, to know how they feel is nothing compared to what all they had done for us. Reading a joke, poem,or a book to them while they sit and listen, or taking them for a 10 minute walk will not take anything away from us, but will give alot to them. It will give them the quality time that they need from us.
Think about the fact that when you grow old, would you like spending your last years sitting in a corner, feeling apologetic to call up to your kids/grand kids just to fetch a glass of water,and your kids ignoring you or making faces at you just because they had to do the work that any young person can do by themselves? Would you like feeling isolated and unwanted like a liability on your children?
No one would like to spend these difficult years in loneliness, therefore it should come from our heart to spend quality time with our old folks,just to see a smile on their face and become the stick that they need to walk with,in their years of white hair and wrinkled skin.